I’m Saying Goodbye


This is going to be long, considering that I haven’t been writing as I should have.

The reason why I said it’s hard to say goodbye is because I’ve got a job offer and I planned to resign. The moment I got the job offer which someone gave me on the spot even before the interview ended happened so quickly that I couldn’t believe it was happening.

I am very grateful and feeling lucky that my future boss is giving me a chance even though I don’t have the skills available that I can offer them on the job. I’m still very much a learning-in-progress person. He asked me whether I know this this and that. I just honestly told him I don’t but he was okay with it.

He didn’t say anything about offering me the position. He instead asked me if I want an appointment letter. Me being blur, didn’t know that he has offered me the job. I was happy after that. Just staring out of the window and playing back what was happening in the room a while ago.

But then, the happiness soon flew further and the dilemma sets in. I felt very heavy-hearted to just throw everything behind. It’s not really the job that I cannot leave behind but the fact that the people and the working environment in my current workplace is indeed excellent. I’m not sure if I’m able to work in some place similar as what I’m working in now but all I can say is that I will miss this place very very much and I will definitely miss all the good people that I’ve known and worked with for the past one year.

After getting the offer, I disturbed the whole world. People that I could think of because there is so much in me that I wanted to express and have someone to listen to me and give me their advice.

I talked to Iris, Mummy and Pappy too. I couldn’t help but cry when I spoke to Pappy. I don’t know why but it’s like a major decision for me and I don’t know what to do.

See lah? When you don’t have a job offer, you worry. When you have a job offer, you worry some more.

After talking to Pappy, I somehow knew what I wanted to do. I tried printing out the resignation letter that I’ve typed a day ago but my printer only allowed me to print a copy of it. Tried to print again this morning but printer didn’t allow me to print at all. So, my only option was to print it in the office. That shows how heavy-hearted my resignation letter and printer can be too. They are as emotional as I am.

When I went to work this morning, my boss came in early too. My plan as I woke up this morning is to walk up to him and settle it there and then. But when I came to the office, I just couldn’t bring myself to do it just yet. So I gave myself some time but told myself that I would need to do it by today.

Then, I finally collected the courage to send my boss an email, asking him if he is free to talk in private for a short while. We went to the meeting room and before I could even say anything, he smiled and said, “So what’s the good news, Grace?”

I smiled and then laughed.

Aiyo, my boss knows.

“I’ve got a job offer….”

He asked where and what I’ll be doing.

“I’m happy for you. I mean I’m happy and sad. Sad because you’re leaving but I’m happy that you got an offer.”

Then, I told him why I think it’s time to move on, telling him I can’t be answering calls forever.

He nodded and said, “Yeah. It has been a year. And you’re too smart to work in this call centre.”

I didn’t know what to say. Tell me how to not like a boss like him? Everything that he has ever said is always so encouraging.

As I walked out of the meeting room, I went back to my desk and as soon as I sat down, my colleague sitting next to me said, “Grace, don’t tell me you’re resigning!”

“Yes, I am.”

She was somewhat speechless. She then told another male colleague, “Yes, she is.”
The male colleague sent me an email with the subject: Noooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

He wrote, “Grace, you are leaving us is it? But why?”

I explained to him and then I asked why.

He replied, “Maybe I’ve never mentioned this to you but I like you a lot!”

I saw his reply and I was smiling. That is really nice of him. Before I could even reply, he added, “I mean as a friend.”

That would be Happiness #9! :”>

I was planning to tell my toilet buddy about me leaving because I can only accompany her to the toilet for another 30 days and after that she would have to go alone or get a new toilet buddy. But before I could even tell her, someone else told her. So when I went to the toilet with her, she said, “Grace, kenapa you nak resign?”

Then, it was time to hand it my letter to the human resource department. It was my first time entering that room after we’ve moved to the new office. But before I went, I gave the human resource colleague a call. She was the one who took me in, persuading me into giving this job a try even though I’ve expressed that I wasn’t interested at all. And since she took me in to this working place, I thought I just wanted her to know when I leave this place as well.

I walked in and gave her the letter.

“Dah dapat kerja baru dah?”


“Okay, you pass this letter to my manager.”

So, I approached the Human Resource Manager, someone I’m talking to for the first time because the last time when I started working here was another manager.

“You sure you want to go back to IT?”

“Yes, I would like to try.”

“I’ve been happy working here. I’ve learnt a lot.”

“Learned through the hard way” She said.

And then, I don’t remember exactly what she said but the human resource colleague who took me in said, “It’s some good work that you’ve done. Good attitude.”

The human resource manager then suggested a company that I can try for IT jobs and explained to me what the advancement is like. You see lah? Why is she so nice? I cannot imagine that she’s actually telling me that.

I walked out of the room, feeling so happy and relieved.

Before that and the night before, I was really so confused and worried. But after doing the things I need to do, I felt much better.

We had a training on Telephone Skills today after work and it was the male colleague who earlier sent me an email who gave the presentation. It was a good one. Points that we may already know but it was interesting to see him talk. He speaks excellent English and most of the time, I think he makes a good deejay.

It was time to go home after that and as I was walking to the car park with another colleague, getting to another colleague who’s driving us home today. Coincidently, another girl was there as well. So, I just had to tell them about me leaving the company.

I just blurted out.

“Okay, I want to tell you all something. I’ve resigned from the company.”

“What?! You must be joking!”

“I’m serious!”

“Ha? When did you resign? Did you submit your letter today?”


“OH MY GOD! I’m so sad.”

Tomorrow I will have more questions to answer.


It is so hard to say goodbye.

I have so much to think about that I don’t know how to write it out here. Hopefully, I would be able to write it out tomorrow.


Akademi Fantasia is Back!

And so I’ll be glued to the TV every Saturday at 8:30pm next week till early August. This is so fun!

The person who started the craze was I think my mum. She was watching Akademi Fantasia Season 1 and we just sat next to her and followed the show. Then, we were addicted. It’s Season 4 now. Pappy would be watching too because he has got no choice when 3 other ladies in the house are watching. Hehe. But he likes it also. He is good in predicting who’s going to be kicked out in the next round.

My maid at home in Sandakan loves it too. I still remember the both of us watching in the kitchen (where the 2nd Astro decoder set is located) while Pappy watches other program in the living room. My maid and I whom I call “Kakak” rarely talk. She is shy. I’m also shy. I’ve always been very good with all my previous kakaks. Maybe they are very talkative. But this is one kakak that I just cannot talk much with. But we smile a lot. She looks a bit like Siti Nurhaliza.
That aside, Pappy would have to sit down when we watch Korean dramas or Hong Kong dramas on Wah Lai Toi. Sometimes there would be crying scenes. He would go, “Nice to watch meh? Everyday also cry, cry, cry. I know what will happen next. Sure cry again.”

Cry, cry, cry. In the end, he will also sit down and watch what.

Tonight, they will be showing Akademi Fantasia’s Prelude Concert with the very funny host, Aznil Haji Nawawi. I like him a lot. What’s interesting this season is we’ve got a Chinese contestant, Karen from Kota Bharu. I want to see her sing.

I can’t wait for tonight. I want to hear Liya sing Sudirman’s “One Thousand Million Smiles”.


Happiness Is...

Happiness Is…#8

Seeing a small French boy sitting on a chair, with his head rested on his crossed arms, staring at the DVD at the DVD shop.

Then he said to his Mum, “I WANT ZORRO!”

He got down from the chair and started to look elsewhere.

He came back again, trying to get the Zorro out of the display shelf. He was a little short to reach it.

I took it from the shelf and gave it to him. His eyes only laid on the DVD and he looked at it again with such a happy smile.

His mum asked him again which are the ones he wants.




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