I’m happy and I’m also not happy today.

I’m not going to give up just yet. Message was clearly conveyed but was not fully accepted.

Maybe I should focos on the happy stuff today because I’ve got one more door opened…and I want to walk into that door.




I think I saw 2 gay dogs yesterday after dinner. Was walking back to the car with a friend and I saw 2 dogs. They are not very cute as in the puppy kind of cute but I had wanted to say cute because the two of them were like so friendly, walking and standing close to each other. Very loving like that lor.

Suddenly, one of them started climbing up on the other dog and “do” it. I was like, “Whoa!”

Then there were guys working inside a shop that saw it and was so happy enjoying the scene.

It was a very quick one so when the other dog who was up stood on the ground again, I saw both dogs have what a male dog should have so…the first thing that came to my mind, “I didn’t know a dog can be gay too.”

Anyway, it may or may not be gay. Maybe just practising his skills with a trusted friend. Not doing in but appears like he’s doing it. Maybe it was just pure illusion.

That’s yesterday’s story.

Today…I feel the need to express about something I feel strongly tomorrow. It’s been in my head and my heart for weeks already and it’s really not going anywhere unless I am being vocal about it. May or may not get what I expect to get but at least I should try in getting the message across. At least, I know I’ve tried to fight for it and it’s better than sitting down whining and expecting people to read my mind.

Quite excited and look forward to that actually because I’ve always been the kind that silently accepts, always agreeable but I really think for this time, I cannot continue to dwell in this. I need to do something for myself before I sulk further and become unhappy because I can already see the symptoms. My facial expression is not as cute anymore and I certainly do not want to look grumpy.

I need courage!

Do, or do not, there is no try.  – Yoda


You First!

Don’t you just hate it that you know he’s not there but you keep restoring your MSN window to see if he’s there?

And when you see him there, you keep guessing if he’ll talk to you first?

Then, you really can’t stand the wait anymore but you still resist yourself from making that first move.

Then, I said to myself, “SCREW THE RULES!”



Billie Jean

Everyone was talking about it and it felt like I was the last to know. And that I’ve not really been reading news.

When I heard of the news, I was like, “Uh..ok”. Still didn’t quite believe it and was trying to register in my mind that Michael Jackson has passed away.

I still wasn’t feeling anything because I was too busy trying to figure out the work emails I was reading. It was until I was driving home from work that I switched to HITZ.FM (because I have been listening to purely ONE.FM for more than a week) and they were playing solely MJ’s songs. CNN was also reporting the news for the whole day and I learnt a new term today, cardiac arrest.

So I tore open a packet of junk food and tuned into BBC because CNN was showing Business news, trying to get more information and I’m now listening to Billie Jean.

May you rest in peace.

Happiness Is...

Happiness Is…#44

Today I ordered a regular beef bowl but was given a large beef bowl for the price of a regular bowl. 🙂

The staff wasn’t aware that he was packing my beef bowl rice with a larger box until the cashier pointed it out to him that he should have used the smaller box.

“Tak pe lah”, the cashier told him and she handed me the plastic bag with my yummy beef rice.

I wasn’t looking into the plastic bag but I was feeling the size of the box with my hands. It was until I reached home and took out the box that I knew, it was a large one. Hehe. I was feeling fuller than ever because of more rice and more beef.

Thank you Yoshinoya!