I was struggling over the past few days in accepting something that I didn’t like doing but was asked to do. It’s not that I can say no with the position I am in now. Maybe I can…but it would spell disaster. I was being miserable about it for so long. A few days is so long, considering that it was really a small matter and I shouldn’t have spent so long being upset.
Yesterday I went to swim after being frustrated for the whole day. You see, I was at home nursing my wisdom tooth. I went to the dentist but my dentist wasn’t free so I settled with another dentist who is available in the same clinic since I really was getting annoyed with the pain. This dentist insisted on giving me only 1 hour MC. How’s that for being ridiculous? I was in pain for a few days and now she says I can’t take a full day MC. Man, was I angry. I kept on insisting until I got something which is more than half a day but still less than a day. I’m so pissed that I’m going to let this known to my ORIGINAL dentist when I visit him the next time. Like I don’t have enough to pain me already, someone just got to be so inconsiderate. Anyway, my mood was bad so yea…I went to swim. I was so angry that I went swimming.
I SWAM AND I SWAM. I JUST KEPT SWIMMING. Probably I swam the most laps yesterday due to the anger and pain.
Then, I finally stood still in the pool and talked to myself. I told myself I can rant, complain and be moody all I want today but tomorrow I’m going to be the lovable person again.
I woke up this morning and my gum is still in pain and I’m sort of getting used to the pain now. I’m going to let it grow for a few more days and if the pain still persists, it’s another round to the dentist, this time with x-ray. This would be my 3rd x-ray. And I must say I don’t know why my set of teeth is giving me so much problem that this year is going to be the year of TEETH. It’s really all about teeth this year. You’re bored about it I know and so am I.
And I woke up this morning with some sort of enlightenment. I got myself into accepting to do the thing I didn’t like doing and I kind of justified myself into doing it because that’s the only way I can be happy. If I couldn’t change it now, the only way is to try to accept it and try to make it a fun thing. I hate doing something I don’t like and keep going on ranting about it…I just know I won’t be happy. So, that’s why the self-talking and I think I’m okay la so far. No choice but have to do this la…for the sake of my own happiness.
I think I’m now going through and experiencing a series of growing pains in my mid-20s.