A Busy Start

Green bean soup is cooking in the kitchen while I’m writing this. It’s been a long time since I last boil this soup. I saw packets of rock sugar while doing getting vegetables at the supermarket for dinner tonight and so I thought why not I cook green bean soup. With the recent hot weather, this would be just perfect.

Been feeling really tired that I’ve been napping immediately once I get home from work for two days straight. My days are filled to the brim and I find myself not having enough time to do the things that I need to do. With CNY approaching, it just seems impossible to get my spring cleaning done in time. But I will try to at least get the most important things done.

I want to get back to my writing ritual. I need to train myself to write something on alternate days at the least.

That’s it!

It’s been a long time since I last gotten very angry like I did today.

I’m very disappointed to say the least.

When I go out on a date with someone, I would put my focus on spending good time together. I expect the same in return. If the person is too busy to even stop checking his phone, updates his statuses, and not being able to listen to what I say since his concentration is with the phone and not his surroundings and the people around him, then I think a date is not necessary. And because it’s not the first time and also not the first time that I actually have to say it out directly of what’s wrong..that makes it more disappointing.

When someone says he’s sincere in asking me out, I believe him. And so I thought, I would just be more forgiving. However, the following date never happened because he overslept so I arranged my own dinner plans after that.

And then I trust that he’s really being very sorry for not being to make it to dinner and so he wants to make it up for lunch today. I waited and when the time came. I knew it wasn’t going to happen. He overslept again. This must be a joke. I felt like a fool.

I sometimes wonder why is it that it can never be right just for once. Why can’t I matter to someone. Why is it people say one thing but does another. Why is it so hard to just be sincere, as in sincere with both in words and putting it into action. And if it’s so hard to even be serious about something, I don’t see why I should hang around and be an angel.

I cannot afford to be nice anymore. And I’m not nice when it really gets to my nerves. With that, I’m drawing a line because my time is worth more than just waiting around for something that I’m not sure if it’s ever going to happen.

I rest my case.