In Loving Memory

Dear Bunny,

It’s been 10 years since you left. I hope you still remember me for I still remember you and will always do no matter how many years will pass.

You are magical. You are mystical. I’m very blessed and happy that you came into my life even just for the slightest period of time.

My first memories of you is me chasing you in the rain with an umbrella. We both ran in circles in the backyard. I wanted to shelter you from the rain. You must be thinking what is this woman trying to do to you.

I stopped and let you be in the rain. You in your brown and white suit amidst the green grass. Love at first sight.

One day, I noticed a lady was standing outside at the backyard fence, feeding you. For that split second, I was worried someone who lost you will take you back where you belonged. I didn’t want that to happen even though I still had no clue until this very day how you ended up at my backyard. Were you wild? Were you lost? Did you escape? Did you come to find me? I wanted to win your heart so badly. I bribed you with a carrot for a start. I’m glad that it wasn’t intimidating for you after the chase in the rain.

Slowly…you didn’t go near the fence anymore, you stay nearer towards the kitchen door, where I will appear and feed you with your favourite food. Carrot, leafy vegetables…sometimes apples, grapes. I love you so much to buy you apples and grapes. 🙂

And so…this becomes a daily ritual. I will come home every day from college and head straight to the backyard to feed you. You started to recognise that it’s me coming by the sound of the kitchen door unlocking. Then, it became a routine that by 5pm-ish, you will be waiting there for me..to my delight without waiting for the sound of the door lock. I caught you doing this by peeping from the window before I opened the kitchen door. I see you waiting there and I will be reeling in joy behind the curtains. It’s a wonder you know what time it is without a watch.

It felt like we can’t wait to see each other everyday. I have not derived so much pleasure in buying carrots before but I did with you.

We will talk. I don’t talk aloud when I talk to you. I just talk to you in my mind and tell you how I was feeling that day. You will listen while busy enjoying your food. I will stroke you gently and you will let me. You will still hold at the same position even though I’ve stopped. That will always put a smile on my face.

The vegetables that I buy for you…mostly choy sum, were always stored in a yellow plastic bag. I buy them from TOPS supermarket. This supermarket no longer exist by the way. You would always stick your head into the yellow plastic bag whenever you find that there are no more vegetables on the ground. Do you know how cute is that?!

There was once where I was daydreaming and was in deep thought about something. You finished your vegetables and then you buzzed me by placing your paws on my knees and brought me back to the real world again. You did that only once but it was so special because I’d never thought you’d do that.

Thank you also for sticking around during my college break when I went back to Sandakan, leaving you alone with just grass at the backyard to feed on. I was away for 2 months and I was worried sick if you’d run away. You don’t know how thrilled and amazed I was when I discovered that you were still around. White and brown in the green. The way I first spotted you.

Your belly seemed to expand and it’s when I knew you were pregnant. The thing is…how? You must have someone that you fell in love with before I met you. Your babies did not survive. I didn’t get to see you gave birth as I heard from the neighbour that you went over to give birth and they actually took your babies away. Probably wanting a piece of you, since you were so cute. Thank you again for staying alive though I don’t know if you were too sad for words.

The day you left me was also the day my boyfriend dumped me. He was jealous that I’m spending time with you. He left a break-up note on my table when I was downstairs and outside with you. Talk about being young and silly! I texted him the next day when I found out that you were gone and asked if he’s happy now that you’re gone.

I called Mum and Dad but I wasn’t able to speak on the phone. All I spoke was tears and more tears. Pappy consoled me by saying maybe it’s not you, it’s another Bunny that died. He didn’t know what else to say to make me stop crying.

I told Pappy about you just now that you’ve been gone 10 years today. Guess what he said? He said…Facebook it. He loved you too and he managed to meet you just once and he bought you a big radish. I mean big and I’m sure you remember it. I don’t think you enjoyed that radish because you only ate a little of it. My then boyfriend was actually quite fond of you too even though he was equally jealous at the same time. He actually bought you ginger when he knew you just gave birth. He said logically, you need to have a confinement period and thus the ginger. Funny if you ask me how he treats you like a human. You only had 2 little bites of the ginger and I know you hated it. No matter how he placed the ginger near your mouth, you just won’t budge. Then I told him he was crazy and to stop torturing you!

I know you are around somewhere. Thank you and I love you.

Your bunny friend,
Grace

Black

My long hair is weighing me down and starting to get messy so I decided to go for a 2-inch cut.

I went to a different hairdresser and this time it’s a guy. One thing about hairdressers…they like to ask you personal questions. From your age, where you stay, occupation to your relationship status.

And he actually asked me if I had dye my hair black. I guess my hair is just too black to be true.