Back to Work

It’s 2 something in the morning and I’m awake. At least I’ve had 4 hours of sleep before this. So hopefully after writing this, I’ll be able to sleep by 3.

It was so difficult to wake up this morning to go to work because I only felt sleepy when I had to wake up. Washed my hair so that I’d stay awake throughout the day. Driving to work needed more focus and concentration than usual as my eyes were very tired.

It’s nice to be in the office again, where a darling colleague couldn’t help express how much she missed me while I was away. I had 350 emails in my inbox throughout the 2 weeks that I was away but not all requires action so it wasn’t too bad but I’ve got work to finish off.

I received an email from someone that I didn’t know and thinking it was spam because the fonts were in red and I didn’t bother to read it further. Then, the darling colleague said she has something to tell me and judging by the way she put it, I knew it wasn’t good news.

We went to the toilet and she spoke silently, trying very hard to explain to me of what happened. She seemed to be choking and seemed afraid to tell me about it. She asked if I read an email with red font and that it contains a link to a forum post about me. A male colleague posted it just because I decided not to send him home anymore. Can you believe that?

He talked bad about me, illustrating stories that his imagination takes him to, none of which exists. I was advised not to read it as it is hurtful and words being used are harsh. I’m very tempted to read it in the office today but I didn’t want to spoil my day. I am still tempted to read it but I will stick to not reading it at all.

I’ve not done anything wrong so I just don’t want to be bothered with it. It is disheartening indeed to be treated that way. I’ve never seen anyone like that, doing something so childish, more so for a guy who is educated. When he was told that I’m not sending him anymore, he thought I was joking. I think he hates me to pieces and thinks that I owe him free rides everyday after work.

I’m always willing to help if it’s within my means and I do drive 2 other colleagues home when they need a ride back. I decided not to send him because personally I don’t like his attitude and character and I feel very irritated when I have him in my car. The old and usual me would feel obliged to send him but sometimes there are limits to what the heart can take and I didn’t want to do something I don’t feel like doing this time. Simply put, I am nice when people are nice and I can choose not to be nice to people who are not nice.

I will be as cool as I can be, pretending I know nothing about it and I will not hate him. If it satisifes him and makes him happy to badmouth me, I cannot stop him from doing so but I don’t want to be affected by someone like that because it’s just not worth it.