CNY Day 8: I’m Leaving Home

Started off the morning by having breakfast with a friend and his family. *Siah, it was nice meeting you!*

Went back home to pack my stuff. Mummy just couldn’t stop stuffing more food into the luggage. It came to a point where there isn’t any space left in the luggage but she was very persistent to get it all in.

“Grace, can you put in this 4 jagung into your bag?”

I managed to squeeze them in among my clothes.

She also made us bring vegetables from Sandakan. She packed all the Chinese New Year cookies for us. Mandarin oranges. She cooked dinner for us so that we wouldn’t need to cook once we land ourselves in KL. My super mum!

Before we left the house, Mummy boiled turtle eggs for us. I’m sorry but I killed a turtle today.

There were lots of people in the airport as compared to normal days because everyone’s flying back to study/work today. Iris and I still got back the same seat we had when we flew back to Sandakan. Emergency row, on the right.

It was nostalgic! It made me think of the day when I sat at the same place and cheering happily when the plane landed at Sandakan Airport. Today, I wasn’t cheering at all.

Saw the same people too. An ex-classmate of mine who flew back to Sandakan on the same plane as me and now flying back to KL on the same plane as me too. Sandakan-borned national swimmer, Elvin Chia was on the same plane too.

I reached home at around 4 something and unpacked my stuff. I was a little tired and I just sat on the sofa, thinking of what to do. I’m a little lost actually and still recovering from homesickness and trying to accept the fact that I’m no longer in Sandakan but in KL.

“Iris, so much food we got here. Even, fresh vegetables from Sandakan!”

“Yes. There wasn’t any place to put the 4 jagung but Mummy says you like them. So she wanted the jagung to go with you to KL.”

I was all okay until Mr.Boyfriend came to visit me. I hugged him as he walked into the house and then the tears started to flow. I feel happy to see him again but at the same time, missing my home so so so much. I miss the good times I had with my friends and my family. All the memories. Just the thought of being there.

I’ll think about Mummy and Pappy, just the two of them being there. Anyway, just thinking of those wonderful moments make me want to cry even more now. Sometimes I wish I could stay a little longer. This is by far my shortest trip back to Sandakan since I’m working now. Maybe I shouldn’t look at it that way of how short or long a trip it is. At least, I get to go back.

I think people cry lesser when they get older. Like how children like to cry when they are young and they become more stable when they grow up. I’m otherwise. I cry even more as I grow older.

I shed a tear or two too last night as I was lying on the bed that I only get to sleep on once a year. I told Mummy about it and she went, “So emotional one ar?”

She even said, “Grace, don’t cry ok?”

I won’t listen. I would still cry because I just feel like crying.

I know I’ll be fine. I’ll just need to cry and then move on. It isn’t my first year being away and I’ve survived 7 years being away, going back and coming back again.

If we don’t part, we would never meet again. I’ll remember what Mummy said today.