I Rant!

Sorry but I’ve got to rant.

My mood is actually quite chirpy like I was excited and was parading to mum the new clothes that I bought which I thought was nice. Well, if it wasn’t nice I wouldn’t have bought it in the first place, right?

Then, the comments started flowing in. I looked thin. I looked old. Nothing that I wore actually looked right. My favourite skirt that I’ve been wearing suddenly got a judgment today that it’s horrible. I mean..I don’t know what is nice anymore.

Every time I put on my shoes, this white shoes that my colleague commented just the day before that it’s pretty, my mum would say I’M ALWAYS WEARING THE SAME SHOES EVERYDAY. What’s wrong with that? She will say it again tomorrow and day after tomorrow and the days to come.

Sometimes my mum makes me feel ugly. She comments about everything that I wear. Sometimes I really feel like suffocating. And don’t get her started to talk about my face. It’s never right. It’s always with pimples, pimples and pimples and pimples and pimples and bloody PIMPLES.

And don’t get her started about relationship. She’s always asking me to give birth to a baby. I don’t know when I can do that okay? Not with the lousy relationship state I am in now. And she’s always got this way of relating how I dress to why I’m not attracting possible suitors. So much so that I’m already frustrated myself, I’m feeling even more frustrated with how she’s feeling towards me and the whole thing. You think I don’t want to have someone to love me meh? I just don’t understand why they wanna treat me like shit lor.

I’m trying to understand my mum’s point of view. Like maybe she’s worried that I’m getting older and she always think this is MY MARRIAGE PERIOD. BUT SOMETIMES AS MUCH AS I TRY, I CANNOT UNDERSTAND. I mean what do you want me to do lah?

SO TOMORROW I’M GONNA WEAR UGLILY TO WORK!

since whatever that i think looks good on me doesn’t seem to be the right choice

4 thoughts on “I Rant!

  • July 23, 2008 at 9:48 am
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    hey grace…
    dun be sad. my mum sometimes do this to me too.. haha.. but then i jus dun listen to her. i jus wear watever i wan cos i’m happy and comfortable wif the clothes. so if u’re happy, u’ll look pretty and confident!! trust me.

    and pimples.. aiya.. i guess urs is not as serious as mine rite? tel ur mama, there’s a gal out there wif face allergy. lagi cham (pathetic).. haha… i got pimples all over my face. and they popped out at my face out of sudden ler.. u tel me.. how sad and depressed i am.. haha.. but now ok d. got used to it and i believe tat those kns pimples will go away soon. so dun worry abt urs ya 🙂 trust me. jus make sure ur face is clean and dun squeeze ur pimples.. dangerous as it wil spread.. :d

    liang_muis last blog post..YOU DON’T MESS WITH THE ZOHAN!

  • July 23, 2008 at 9:52 am
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    oh well. i understand how u felt coz i feel the same way a lot of time too, coming from my mother. de other day i told her i cut my hair again and she said ‘no wonder its so ugly’.. it really make me feel down.. its ok if it is coming from a stranger..
    and sometimes she just makes me feel so small and unappreciated… that i dont bother to get her advise sometimes although i really yearn the approval… its complicated.. maybe we really care coz it comes from some1 we love..

  • July 23, 2008 at 4:27 pm
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    Babe don’t say that. You don’t know what is ugly. Ugly is when you see how I wear to work. Even I can’t tahan with myself anymore! I forever wear the same old pants, same old sneakers…So who’s ugly now?

  • July 24, 2008 at 9:25 am
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    aiyo… dun compare the ugliness ok… i’m oso wearing the same old pants, same old shoes, same old sandals to work and shopping.. haha.. so wat!! who cares!! so dun b sad… i kno.. it’s kinda hard to accept bcos it’s from ur own mum.. haha 😀 take it easy…

    liang_muis last blog post..SUFFOCATED!! OXIGEN PLS!!

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